I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Randomize
