Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
