I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
