But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize