He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize