he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
