Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
