"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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