Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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