At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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