Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
