I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
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