He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
