Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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