Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Randomize
