too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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