just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
