We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
the day after is always just damage control
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize