Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Randomize
