dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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