but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
