it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
tell me about the eggs
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
