she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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