woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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