I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
