I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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