i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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