she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
