Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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