Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
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