What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
