just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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