I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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