3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
