Quick, to the slutcave!
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
