I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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