You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
