She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I just gift wrapped bread.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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