ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
