the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
