Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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