Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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