love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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