I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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