okay pat passed out under dana's car
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Randomize
