Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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