I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
whose ass print is on the piano?
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
