I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
