i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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