how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Randomize
