if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
i just sent this text using only my big toe
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
